Friday, October 3, 2008

A few quick hits

  • The Cubbies are melting down like I predicted they would. The schadenfreude is palpable. I fucking LOVE the Cubs for this; it makes the Mets meltdown all the more tasty. I'm like that guy in Hannibal - the one who makes kids cry and then makes martinis from their tears. The Cubs bombing out in a sweep tomorrow night in LA will be my martini made of Chicago's tears.
  • I saw the most hilarious accident yesterday. Driving down Western, it's slow and crowded. I'm easing up a bit just in case the light goes yellow, to avoid "blocking the box" (which sounds like what my friends used to do to me at bars). This douche-nozzle in an Audi zips into the right turn lane to get around me. Normally I pull the hit move of "accelerate and shut him out" but there wasn't enough room to do it safely - the car in front of me was about one car length ahead. I made the right call - this idiot zips into the gap ahead of me and promptly rams into the car ahead of him in a spectacularly stupid rear-end fender bender. I laughed my ass off, and as I crawled by in the traffic, I rolled down my window and yelled, "Serves you right for driving like an asshole!"
  • Speaking of "blocking the box" - fucking suburban Cubs fans had better learn to NOT do this or I'm going to start hurling bricks. I sat at the exit on Western for 4 light cycles last night because every time the light turned green, there were 5 or six cars sprawled across the intersection ashamed to make eye contact with me or my middle finger. I fantasized about punching every single one of them with brass knuckles until they looked like the Angel Face from Fight Club.
  • There's a new phenomenon with bookers of showcases in Chicago it seems - rather than a polite "you're not right for our show" or "sorry, we're booked" they just ignore your request for information. Way to act just like a 17 year old chick too afraid of confrontation. Their room, their rules, no entitlement here, but act like a fucking adult.
  • Please ignore the previous bullet point, because I never act like an adult and haven't given any of them nearly enough time to get back to me. Aren't I a fucking professional? (answer: no)
  • I finally have a "professional" website up with fancy-ass placeholder and everything. I'm going to teach myself PHP! www.johnbarrytech.com
  • Also, http://www.chicagostandup.net - the first Secret Project I've worked on. It's a wiki combined with google calendar right now, and I'm hoping to add some mapping mashup functionality and automated housecleaning scripts for it. Mostly just ways for me to mess around with PHP and Google Tools, making my nerd skillset a little more rounded. Also, I hope (transparently) that it gets me additional bookings.
Have a good weekend kids, I have to take a dump.

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