Monday, April 6, 2009

Conundrums

Most people overestimate what they can do in a year and underestimate what they can do in a decade
-Tony Robbins
First off, apologies for quoting someone with such a Mephistophelean smile. He's obviously up to no good, and is shilling self-help along with it.

But that quote seems to ring true. Or if it doesn't ring true, now is a good time to start talking about ten years from now.
I think that's something you really don't get in your twenties - the actual scope of time. Face it - you've been alive for 2.x decades but chances are there's been less than 5 years of true autonomy.
Most of your life in your twenties are coming to grip that you're officially rudderless and adrift - no longer are you setting your course by some other captain. It's all yours, baby.

Take all the rope you need, and try not to fashion a noose.

I feel like I just completed my first decade of true autonomy. I graduated college at approximately 23, and spent the next ten years doing my thing. Didn't have 10 year plans, nor 5 year plans even. Just had a "I don't want to do what I do for a living forever" feeling in my head.

I tried out standup. I bombed for 3 months straight but at the time I wanted to do nothing more than comedy.
Now, I'm not so sure.
Part of this is me seething with resentment at not getting an audition for Just for Laughs at any of the three showcases I was aware were having them.
Part of it is not having calls returned when I'm trying to figure out how to get booked at X and Y room.
Most of it though, is taking the above two items personally. I know they're not. Show business is a tough business even if you're good.
If you're not persistent, if you have any other option but comedy, chances are you're going to drop the whole comedy route. (also, I didn't ask anyone FOR an audition; I was ignorant they were happening but I also didn't ask anyone. My fault.)

Which is basically the conundrum. The horns of a dillemma.
What is the thing I want to spend the next decade getting really good at? What do I want to become an expert in? Comedy? Writing? Technical Development?
What's the job I want to grow into so it doesn't feel like I have a job?

What's the end game of any of these goals?

I don't know the answer, but I should probably figure it out damn soon.

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