Monday, December 28, 2009

(un)Friendly drunken X-mas tips

I've heard two different comedians comment on something in the past few days, and have heard SHITLOADS of "normal" people also mention this over the past years. I normally don't correct this sort of thing, (hahahahhahaha yes, this is the one thing I'm not a pedantic twat about) but I figured since he's the reason for the season, we should talk about Constantinople Jesus.

Dear Dumb Shit Christians* Who Complain About X-Mas taking the "Christ" out of Christmas - It is called X-Mas because X is the greek symbol "Chi" which is the first Greek letter of Christ.
It's not us atheists pissing on your pagan holiday substitution for Saturnalia.
Constantine is fucking with you, yo.

I'm very tired of the majority religion (Christianity) attempting to adopt a persecution complex in this country. You Are Not Persecuted. I've never worked for a company since graduating college that required me to work on Christmas.
I've only had Yom Kippur off if I've requested it myself**.
I'm not spending my money on political organizations to prevent Shar'iah law; I'm giving money to the ACLU*** to protect gay rights and a woman's right to choose. These battles are fought because Christians have defined the battleground.
And fuck you for doing so.
In your quest to prevent gays from happiness, you've forgotten what agape means. We're all worms according to your God; fruit of the knowledge of good and evil assure us of that.
But no, you're fucking better than the gays.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck
Yooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Cry about the war on Christmas. Whine about the secular takeover of America.
And do it all married up, because some animals are more equal than others, piggies.

In vino, veritas.

*Not all Christians are dumb shits. Even if most of you are, you're on par with the secular/other religious community. Dumb shititude is found aplenty in all races and creeds***.

** Never took it off to atone. FYI.

*** Admittedly, it's been a while since I gave them money. Sort of a hypocrite right now. Alcohol!

****Look at this blog for multiple examples of what an atheist Irish know-it-all prick dumb-shit looks like

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